The Island

Out of nowhere, this film has appeared, seeming to be aiming for the Top Summer Blockbuster spot, with big names like Ewan McGregor, Sean Bean (I wish his name rhymed…) and Scarlet Johansen. Djimon Honsou got high billing as well, despite appearing for all of two minutes, mostly screaming and bulldozing people out of the way. The story revolves around farmed humans, made for organs and to bear children, who are sentient despite what the company which makes them tells the public. When one clone discovers that the story they are being fed, of surviving a nuclear holocaust and one by one being shipped to ‘The Island’, the last remaining area of inhabitable land, is false, he must flee for his life with a secret that could ruin one of the most lucrative businesses in the world. It’s not a terribly original idea, but it provides a good platform for typical Michael Bay Hollywood pap.

The way the premise is presented doesn’t fare well under scrutiny, so it’s best to just switch off the brain, because after all, it’s all an excuse for car chases and big explosions. If you think too much, you’ll get stuck on the plot holes, convenient coincidences and reasons why the premise doesn’t really work – so the way you’ll have the best time is by accepting the clichés – the evil corporate bad guy, the heroes who cause the deaths of dozens of people (but it doesn’t matter because they’re not the heroes), the paid killer who turns good because he sees why these particular victims are worth turning against his employer for – and just putting them aside.

So in this spirit, the film wasn’t bad at all. The soundtrack was excellent – modern and energised – and the effects were of course spectacular. A screenplay Michael Bay shoots will probably never make you think very much, but he knows how to keep your attention with action sequence after action sequence, always thrilling, always inventive. Ewan McGregor was miscast, lacking the childish naivety that the clones are supposed to have, which the script makes clear includes his character, even if he does have a more developed brain than he should. In fact, about the only ones to pull this off were the guy who plays Neelix in Star Trek and Scarlet Johansen. I’ve never thought Johansen especially remarkable, other than looking stunning, but there was an innocence and purity about her that suited the part perfectly. McGregor is probably the more gifted performer, but in this instance, he was not at all suited to the role he was playing.