Plane film 2: Murder on the Orient Express

I was going to watch the Blade Runner sequel for my second film on the return leg to Japan, but it was far too long and I had no hope of squeezing it in. So instead I opted for a Kenneth Brannagh double-bill.

This time, he was not only starring but directing, in a much more playful and fun role. Like most people who grew up in Britain, David Suchet will always be the definitive Poirot for me, but it’s fun to see such a well-known actor take a crack at this character. The archetype Poirot is part of is also in vogue just now – the eccentric, egotistical genius who is insufferable for people around him but a lot of fun for an audience to watch. See Dr. House, Doctor Strange, Sheldon Cooper etc.

So with an extra focus on OCD, we have another remake of one of the most famous Christie stories. It’s mostly faithful, with various European characters altered to be black or Latino for diversity quota points, because as everyone knows different European nationalities don’t count as diverse.

The cast here is phenomenal. Just about every single character is played by a well-known big name, established or recent. Judi Dench, Johnny Depp, Salma Hayek, Michelle Pfeiffer, Willem Dafoe…the sheer number of recognisable faces who can command top billing all on their own is impressive. And yes, Branagh focusing so much on himself rather than letting these actors shine deserves the criticism it got. And yes, it’s dubious that this was a necessary adaptation when the story has had so many celebrated adaptations before this, and just about everyone knows the big twist – whereas something like The Murder of Roger Ackroyd is becoming increasingly little-known.

The film is as well-made as one might expect, with sweeping shots of the railway journey and beautiful costume details. The music is forgettable but fitting, and the anxious feeling of the middle act is well-executed through editing and framing.

Worth a watch but probably not worth launching a new franchise or replacing Sherlock Holmes in the public consciousness. 

Plane movie 1: Dunkirk

On the way back to Japan I watched something a bit more solemn – and the film I wanted to watch last time I was on the way to Japan too. War flick Dunkirk, following some human stories of the evacuation in 1940.

This isn’t a particularly easy film to watch, nor a satisfying story, as it just follows several characters during the chaos of a panicked evacuation. The only possible triumph is escaping from a far stronger threat alive, though of course everyone knows how the war ended five years later. The narrative essentially follows various characters involved in the evacuation on sea, land and air, with the emotional keypins being the piermaster commanding everything, a pleasure boat owner doing his bit and his son having horrific formative experiences on the journey. An RAF pilot is also heroic in the face of adversity, and there are a number of scenes in sinking boats that are horrible reminders of the consequences of war, but ultimately it’s more of a fragmented overview than a conventional story, and probably stronger for it.

There are a number of familiar faces and some less familiar ones. Kenneth Branagh is a strong patriarchal figure, sometimes kindly, sometimes stoic and sometimes having to be callous. Mark Rylance is probably the standout performer, with the perfect everyman presence for this film. I struggled to remember where I recognised him from – it was partly Bridge of Spies, but mostly The BFG. Then I don’t know whether I should be ashamed or proud to admit I didn’t recognise Harry Styles one bit. He did a fine enough job, not standing out as a poor actor or making me want to follow his acting career, but his character was perhaps the least compelling of the film’s major cast.

Well-made, mature, respectful historically and well-acted, this was an excellent addition to the canon of war films. And like so many other war films, it is moving rather than entertaining. 

Kingsman 2 and Miss Peregrine's

Plane film 1 - Kingsman: The Golden Circle

I quite liked the first Kingsman movie, and it had one extremely memorable extended action shot, but I didn’t particularly like Eggsy as a character and wasn’t nearly hooked enough to see it in the cinema. As another plane film, though, I thought it was worth my time.

This film was a lot more cartoonish than the first, and struggled with tone. I can’t be shocked by the evilness of a villainess forcing her underlings into cannibalism when she has robot dogs watching. I can’t ponder the hypocrisies of the legality of different drugs and the power of drug lords when Elton John is doing flying kicks. The film never seemed sure whether it wanted to be a spy thriller or a comedy, and while it could have pulled off a mix of both, it was often too jarring.

This film sees millions endangered by a classic bad buy plot that basically boils down to poisoning everyone and extorting them for the antidote. Eggsy and co are in dire straits and need help from overseas counterparts. Everything works out through a combination of character shields, coincidence, techno-magic and bad guys attacking one by one, but there are some great setpieces on the way, some fantastic combat choreography (especially with a lasso), and some satisfying moments of going out in a blaze of glory and self-sacrifice.

Julianne Moore and Halle Berry have fun with their roles here, and unsurprisingly Colin Firth had to be brought back even if it’s all a bit dubious. I’d probably have enjoyed this a lot more if it had picked either comedy or drama wholeheartedly, but it was still a fun little diversion.

Plane film 2 – Miss Peregrine’s Home for Peculiar Children

This seemed like my sort of film – Tim Burton directing a gothic-tinged story about kids with superpowers set (at least in part) in the 40s. But I wasn’t desperate to see it, mostly because it just seemed like yet another retread of the X-Men premise of a bunch of kids with superpowers gathered together in a school until a menacing force makes the unleash their powers and kick bad guy butt.

I’m glad I’ve seen it now, and it was also a pretty fun movie not to be taken seriously, but in many ways it was also a disappointment. The smaller disappointment was how long the thing took to get going, with the central conflict not even rising until about an hour in. The much larger one ended up being that there was absolutely no question whatsoever of the bad guys overpowering the good. On the good guy side there were a couple of useless kids, sure, but then a slew of them who could kill you with a glance. The bad guys were basically Mystique, Iceman and Beast, and just never had any chance against the far more powerful kids. Samuel L. Jackson in particular is constantly talked up as powerful and unstoppable, but can’t actually do anything much and gets easily stopped by some of the less powerful children. He, his fellow baddies and the supposedly feral monsters are also bizarrely careful not to harm any kiddies or cause any serious injury to random passers-by in Blackpool.

It was fun to see the kid from Hugo again, older and lankier than before. Shame neither he nor Miss Peregrine herself had much character. Samuel L. Jackson and Judi Dench obviously have fun, and this is undeniably a feast for the eyes almost throughout. It’s a fun film to look at, and the kids’ designs are great. The problem is the story is so generic, the setting has been seen many times before, the climax is a real let-down and the rules of time travel and affecting the future are completely arbitrary.

How I wish I knew what that magic x-factor is that makes a kids’ book successful in America, even if it’s just a rehash…